Crushes are normal and happen to almost everybody. One can have a crush at any stage of their lives. It is normal to feel a certain level of attraction to someone who is around them often. It can be quite for at times and sometimes it can scary as well. These crushes can happen while at school, or college or office or anywhere in general. This is a sort of attraction that one feels for someone and can have physical and emotional feelings involved. So, the question is how long should a crush last? For some crushes can be over in few days and for some, it may continue longer.
However, by ignoring this feeling and leave it unattended can cause more problems. Therefore, it is either good to get over the crush or simply face the person and see if they feel the same.
There are few things that one can do to manage and handle ones crush towards someone.
- Understanding the feelings
One of the very first things that one needs to do is to come to terms with one’s own feelings. Feelings are a complicated topic for many, and sometimes they can seem complex and convoluted. Well, it is quite natural to feel that way.
But, when one has a crush and one is still unaware of what type of liking it is, it is better to say it loud and deal with it. Few ways to deal with one’s feelings are:
- Talk to a friend
One can talk to a friend about their feelings. Sometimes saying out loud can make one feel more aware of the feelings. Always pick a trustworthy friend, and does not have a habit of spilling the beans to others at the moment.
- Write it down
One may not be that good of a talker or may not have that trustworthy of friends. They can write the feelings down in a journal if they want. The best thing is that there is nobody to read the journal and one can be free with their thoughts.
- Be practical
Sometimes, crushes one has for someone can be quite strong. These strong feelings can make one do stupid things, and can make one look at that person is utmost positively. However, it is important to have some practicality going around. Therefore, it is better to list the flaws and positives about that person to give a perspective to that person.
- Handle the feelings maturely
Okay, one of the things that can cause trouble in one’s personal life and professional life is if the crush is making one do stupid things around. One may make themselves look like a fool in front of others and even in front of the crush as well.
Therefore, it important that one should handle their behaviour is a better way in front of others especially in the presence of their crushes.
- Act normal
One of the things that give one away while their crushes are nearby; is the body language and the way one behaves. It is normal to feel nervous, anxious and fidgety while the crush is around. But the trick is to control the behaviour around them so that one does not scare them away or make them uncomfortable.
- Distance is better
In case, one cannot control their behaviour and one is ending up doing things which are not great, they should simply choose to maintain some distance. This will avoid getting embarrassed in front of anyone.
- Get distracted
Having crushes sometimes can take up one’s energy and all the time and can cause one to avoid other things happening around. If one asks how long should a crush last? Answers can be different. Therefore, it is not necessary to take these crushes too seriously. If one cannot handle themselves well in a social setting and in front of their crush, the best thing to do is to get distracted. Choose something that one may like to do and focus.
- Making a move
Now, usually, there are two situations that one can end up with. One, where they can talk to their crushes and it is absolutely normal. And second, where it is not feasible. But if talking and making a move is possible do it. Two things can happen from it; either it will work or it will not. If it works, then great, but if it does not, then not need to feel bad about it. There are many people and one can always have a new crush over time.
Few things that should be kept in mind while making a move are:
- Ask questions
One of the best conversation starters is to ask questions. This can be a great way to know if they are interested as well. Also, there will no harm was done, if they are not. Ask open-ended queries and have a conversation which is focused on them.
- Going out
Well, now if one has already had a talk and wants to take things further, the best thing to do is going out. Drop hints, and see if they can catch up on them. And, if not, simply ask them out to a place where others will be there, like a pool party. Also, it is better to have a place, time and date already though beforehand to avoid any awkward situations.
- Handling rejection
Now like mentioned above, asking them out or talking to them can result in two things; mutual likings or rejection. In case of rejection, it can be quite tough on people at times especially if the crush was too strong for them. Here are a few things that can help in handling the rejection healthily and positively.
- Focus on positives
It is important to have a positive outlook especially after facing rejection. Write down positive things of life and how one is a better person. Work on the upside affirmations of oneself and one’s life.
- Get a hobby
The best thing to do at times is to work on one’s skills and talents. What can be the best way to do so, if not by accepting and practising one’s hobbies? One can feel better and positive and will slowly feel that the feeling of dejection is going away.
- Talk to someone
Sometimes it is better to talk to someone close and dear. This way one can vent, or they can help in seeing the things from a different perspective. If one does not feel comfortable talking to friends, then they can talk to someone professional if required.
Crushes are common and having healthy crushes is absolutely okay. One should take in a good stride, as sometimes crush can also turn into a relationship. But, in case one gets rejected or if the feeling of a crush on someone is jeopardizing their normal life, then they should proper steps to handle those feelings.